a pregnant woman goes into a coma
months later she wakes up, no longer pregnant
“you had twins! ” the nurse exclaims. “your brother named them”
“what did he name the girl?” the woman asks
“that’s alright, I like denise. and the boy?”
Turtle enjoying a bath)
THROW THAT ASS IN A CIRCLE!!
This woman is perfect. Don’t fight me on this.
– (via dutchster)
IF YOU ARE THE TYPE OF GUY THAT KISSES A GIRL ON THE TOP OF THE HEAD WHEN YOU HUG THEM THEN YOU ARE DOING IT RIGHT MY FRIEND